The Gospel story is all about freedom. The Babe in the manger was born in Bethlehem to liberate the world by conquering sin and death through the Cross and the Empty Tomb. With His blood, Jesus paid the ransom so that dead men could live. In the 11th chapter of his Gospel, John gives a prelude to this in the account of Jesus raising Lazarus from the dead.

It’s a familiar story. Jesus’ friend Lazarus became sick. Knowing what would happen, Jesus delayed his arrival until after he died. Jesus did this purposefully to display His resurrection power as a preview of what He would do for us through His own death and resurrection. After consoling Lazarus’s sisters, Jesus went to Lazarus’ tomb and commanded, “Lazarus, come forth!” And he did! The dead man came back to life. The cold heart started beating as the motionless lungs began breathing again. By His word, Jesus defeated death and His friend was suddenly alive again.

What’s interesting to me is what Jesus says next. “Unbind him and let him go.” Why did He say that? Lazarus was dead and now he’s alive. He’s been set free from the bondage of death. He was now walking again. Why did someone have to loose him and let him go? Because he wasn’t walking free! Someone had to help him get the grave clothes off. Sometimes, we all need help getting the death off of us—the things from our old life and from our past that keep us from walking free. We have found that one of the primary things that binds us and keeps us from walking free is the torment associated with old wounds. Forgiven people cannot walk freely unless they extend that forgiveness to those who wounded them. And most of the time, people need someone to help them forgive.

Day in and day out, we see grown men and women who are tormented, struggling, hurting, bound, hopeless…the list goes on and on. Almost, if not every, person we meet with is struggling with a wound from their childhood. I’ve often thought that if only children could learn how to forgive at the earliest age, they could avoid so much of the pain and torment that carrying unforgiveness throughout their lives brings.

I don’t know any Christ-follower who doesn't want to experience the abundant life Jesus promised us. Unfortunately, from my observation, few seem to be living that life. As we have traveled the country and around the world, we have encountered believers who, from all outward and spoken indicators, are not walking in joy, but instead are living in torment and defeat. The question that presents itself is, “why?” Why do so many of us struggle and muddle our way through our daily lives when Jesus promised us so much more?

The answer is found in the first part of John 10:10. When Jesus said, “I came that they may have life,” He was contrasting Himself with “the thief.” Our enemy, Satan, is a thief who wants to steal our faith, kill our joy, and destroy our effectiveness. He is ruthless in his schemes to keep us from the abundant life our Savior came to give us. Two of his most used tools to short-circuit us are unforgiveness and sin-management. If Satan can keep us bitter and keep us living our lives in our own strength, he can keep us tormented and disconnected from the Holy Spirit’s power. However, Jesus has given us two keys to keep Satan defeated and us walking in freedom. The primary keys to the Abundant Life are to Forgive and to Abide.

At this point in my life, I’ve learned not to underestimate two things: the depravity of man and the power of the Cross of Jesus. We’ve been leading the Forgiving Forward Ministry and Coaching people to freedom for 15 years and every time I think I’ve heard the worst story imaginable, I hear a story that boggles my mind with the atrocities human beings can inflict on other people. At the same time, I am constantly amazed at how the power of the Cross redeems man’s deepest depravity and sets them free. One of the latest examples is my new friend Steve.

Early Thanksgiving morning, all was quiet in the Sim’s household with Maverick, their aging golden retriever, sleeping beside Charlene’s hospice bed. Suddenly, at 3:45 AM, Maverick uncharacteristically jumped up and ran to Steve’s bed and nuzzled him awake. When Steve got up to check on Charlene, she breathed her last few breaths and flew into the arms of Jesus. In that moment Steve lost his wife and best friend and Forgiving Forward lost a dear friend and our most passionate team member.

Did you know that Forgiving Forward is now available in 6 different languages? It’s true! In addition to English, our book has been translated into Hebrew, Arabic, Spanish, Korean and our most recent translation, Russian. Each version has its own “God story” behind the translation process that would amaze you. We regularly hear reports of how the Forgiving Forward book is making an impact in people’s lives who would never be helped through the English edition. This story from Korea will bless you.

I have been asked, “How do you teach forgiveness to those who don’t believe in Jesus and who follow other religions?” My answer was this: “My friend Mike Wells used to say, ‘There is The Way and there is not the Way. Jesus is the Way and every other way is not The Way.’ I only have one bullet in my gun, it’s the Cross of Jesus. If someone won’t accept The Way (Jesus), who is the only Way, why would I give them another way that will lead them away from The Way? If they won’t accept the Cross of Jesus, I have nothing for them.”

Not long ago, I met a man who asked me the common introductory question, “What do you do?” After I shared with him a quick summary of Forgiving Forward, he said, “I wish you could meet with my son and daughter-in-law. They have been through several counselors, and nothing seems to help. The daughter-in-law now wants a divorce, and our son is confused and hurt. None of this makes sense to us. She recently said to him, ‘You’re meaner than my father!’” I responded. “It makes perfect sense to me. She is in torment because she has deep wounds from her father that she hasn’t forgiven.”

Each family member who spoke in court that day expressed a grace that can only be found in the Gospel. And the world noticed. While some criticized the decision to forgive so quickly, most people sat in awe of the families’ choice to forgive, and, for the most part, the Charleston community followed their lead. Instead of returning hate and anger with hate and anger, love and mercy prevailed. The result was a climate that allowed the massacre to be denounced by all sides while reasoned and gut-level conversations about racial division led to substantive dialog and decisions. Instead of a race war, actual healing and reconciliation took place.

One evening in our darkness and despair, Toni and I decided to get out of the house and take a walk around our neighborhood. It’s a 2-mile circular trek around a series of six cul-de-sacs. We were pretty quiet through the first two cul-de-sacs when one of us said, “God has not abandoned us. Where have we seen Him in all this mess? What have we seen Him do in us and for us in the last three months?” We began quietly recounting all the ways our gracious Lord had revealed Himself to us, sustained us, delivered us, provided for us, and worked in us in the three months since everything began to fall apart. For the rest of our walk, we took turns reminding each other of God’s goodness to us in a period of time when people had not been. With each memory, our hearts got lighter as our praise began to drive out the darkness.

I thought about those conversations in downtown OKC this week as I listened to news of the horrific murders of nineteen children and two teachers at the Robb Elementary School in Uvalde, Texas. One of the things that struck me as I listened to all the media’s reports and commentary is that the questions haven’t changed. “How could this happen, and what can we do about it?” Each time an event like this occurs, politicians, pundits, and ordinary people argue back and forth about the why and offer various iterations of ideas that will never provide hope for effective change. Why can’t we fix this?

Jesus came to us, sent by His Father, because we couldn’t get to Him. Unredeemed mankind is incapable of living righteous enough to settle their sin debt or conquer their sin nature. We could never defeat sin... ever! So, He came to live among us so that, through His death and resurrection, He might come to live in us. The way He lived among us is how we live His Life in us… constantly connected to and desperately dependent on Him as we wait for Him to come again.

Brad and Molly came to us in crisis. Three weeks earlier Molly had discovered Brad’s pornography addiction and his multiple affairs, including Molly’s best friend, Brad’s best friend’s wife and prostitutes. She was shocked. A couple of days after the initial confrontation, Brad picked up his Bible. As he began to read something inside him broke. For two hours he tearfully read the Bible and, for the first time, understood the grace of God and the forgiveness provided for him through the blood of the cross. He was dramatically transformed. Heart cleansed. Desires changed.

Well, my responsibility is to own my sin, basically to recognize the wounding and the pain that I've inflicted upon someone and own it and change my mind about it. Repentance. When you talk about reconciliation, you have to have both forgiveness and repentance. Repentance does not mean to change your behavior. It means to change your mind, which will ultimately change your behavior. Repentance is metanoia: to change your mind. So my responsibility is to recognize and confess what I did was wrong, confess it to God, and then go see what I can do to make it right. There's a passage where Jesus, in the Sermon on the Mount, in Matthew 5 says, "If therefore, you are offering your gift on the altar and you remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother, then come and offer your gift.”

What are the Protocols of Forgiveness? Why do we call them protocols rather than steps? What do they actually mean? Forgiveness is not a process, it's a transaction.

What if I'm able to forgive others, but I can't seem to forgive myself? Dr. Bruce and Toni Hebel answer this question and more in this video!

There are certain wounds that are more painful to endure and process than others. Adultery is the deepest form of betrayal within a marriage and leaves devastating wounds in the heart of the victimized spouse that makes forgiveness seem impossible. Conventional wisdom says that even if forgiveness is possible for an unfaithful spouse, recovering from it will take years. But conventional wisdom rarely considers the Cross.

Recently a couple came to us as a last resort. The wife had lost all hope and they were clearly heading for a divorce. As my wife and I worked with these two hurting people, we begin to recognize the telltale signs of unforgiveness. We helped them to discover the deep wounds from their childhood, their past relationships and from each other that were tormenting them both. As we walked them individually through the protocols of forgiveness, we witnessed two unbelievable transformations. They were set free! They were arm in arm as they walked to their car. Their marriage was restored through the power of forgiveness.

The insufficiency of the animal sacrifices gives way to the sufficiency of the Lamb of God who was slain from the foundation of the world. As we reflect on these High Holy Days of Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, let’s celebrate that the ultimate Day Of Atonement was accomplished over 2000 years ago on an old rugged Cross where the spotless Lamb of God was slain for the sin of the world. It never has to be repeated!